Death by Jeopardy!

A 25-year quest for a piece of immortality

Last remaining question in Double Jeopardy. $1600. I am behind. But if I get this question, I can beat Anthony without needing to get Final Jeopardy right. This is good, because Anthony is good at whiffing Final J. If not, I’ll need to nail that final question.

Piece of cake either way.

The category is “Team Edward” — random questions about people named Ed. About 0.24 seconds after the clue is shown, before Alex Trebek has even started reading the question, I have read it and know the answer. Moreover, I know that Anthony doesn’t know the answer. Not his wheelhouse.

I’ve got this.

I am waiting for Trebek to finish reading the clue so I can buzz in at exactly the right time:

These 4 words complete the now-cliched opening of Edward Bulwer-Lytton’s ‘Paul Clifford’: ‘It was a…’

I try to buzz in, almost starting to mouth the words “What is ‘dark and stormy night’, Alex?”, when to my utter surprise, astonishment and shock, Alex says, “Carrie.” Carrie? Who the fuck is Carrie?

Ah. Carrie, the third contestant, who up to now has had zero points. Carrie who has not buzzed in even once in the whole Double Jeopardy round. Carrie who was not supposed to be a factor, and up to now was going to miss Final Jeopardy because she had no points. Did I mention that she had no points?